Rated NC-17 for graphic sex; J/C
Disclaimer: Story-mine. Characters-not.
Summary of part 1. On an away mission, Chakotay stumbles into a grove of flowers that emit a hormone that gives him the urge to find a mate. He sees Tom and drags him back to the grove only to find out that some of the crew have been warned about these flowers. After beaming back to the ship, they learn that the only way to counter-affect the allergy in his system, Chakotay has to 'mate' with Paris. A very reluctant Chakotay tries to get out of it unsuccessfully. They join on the holodeck, in Chakotay's gym program where Tom saves his life, once again. The scene is chock full of embarrassed Chakotay who has never been with a man and a willing Tom, already married to B'Elanna.
If you really don't like C/P, don't read it, however, I consider the preceeding fight and setup to be some of my best (and funniest) writing.
Feedback? Please.
Chakotay entered the turbolift, weary from the afternoon's ordeal, and slightly unstable from that last big swig from Tom's flask.
His comm badge beeped. "Janeway to Chakotay."
He hesitated before acknowledging it. He didn't really want to see her now, but the doctor must have alerted her that they were finished on the holodeck.
"Chakotay here."
"Commander, would you please stop by my quarters?"
"I'll be right there," he sighed.
He knew what she wanted. She needed to know how things had gone with Paris. Maybe there was something to what Tom had said. There was something about the stink of sex on a man that brought out a woman's urge to win him for herself. She needed to see him now that the deed was done. Smell it on him…
She met him at the door as he entered her quarters. He saw that not much had changed since he'd left there several hours before. The lighting, still dim, masked her mood. But somehow it was different. Anxiety charged the air around them. Kathryn's eyes studied him as she attempted to read him and look calm at the same time.
"You wanted to see me?" He felt strangely like a child who had just been caught doing something naughty. Guilty. He felt guilty, not for being with Paris, but for enjoying it. Positive that she could read his mind with those eyes, his ears pinked at what she would see.
Exhaling deeply, he realized that he stunk, not only from the aura of a good lay, but of cheap alcohol. Catching a whiff of the stiff drink, she turned her head. The slight weave on his feet was from the last shot and the absurdity of the situation. Drunk and thoroughly fucked, he felt as if he deserved a dressing-down by his CO.
But it seemed that wasn't her intent. Kathryn placed her hand on his arm and led him to the sofa, straightening his walk minutely with a stiff arm.
Chakotay flopped into his seat and leaned his head back, staring at the ceiling. Without the adrenaline he'd lived on for a couple of hours, he felt the alcohol and exhaustion sapping his strength.
"Are you drunk?" It was asked as an honest question with no hint of accusation.
"Not drunk, Kathryn. But I'm not completely sober, either. This was just to 'loosen me up.' Paris brought it. And it did help, I'll admit." His heavy-lidded eyes watched the emotions float across her face.
"How are you?" She looked at him earnestly, a concerned expression covering her face.
"Funny. That's what Paris kept asking me…"
"Was it as… difficult… as you'd thought it would be?"
Rolling his head to look her directly in the face, he smiled softly. "Actually, it wasn't that bad. Tom was…in rare form."
That rattled her.
"So, you found the whole thing…pleasurable?"
Chakotay's grin deepened. "Just because it wasn't awful doesn't mean that I'd ever opt to do it again. And if you'll recall, I was practically ordered to do this."
"There was no other way, Chakotay. You know that. Time was running out and this offered the best possible outcome."
"And if you had forced the doctor to look for other alternatives, you'd have to admit to yourself how much it bothered you."
She swallowed hard, but kept her eyes on his.
"I just wasn't supposed to enjoy it, right? It bothers you that we…I did." This was a statement, not a question.
Kathryn looked trapped. "Why should it bother me? I mean, it had to be done. I'm sure you're both quite… Well, no sense in keeping it clinical."
"Clinical?! I had to share my body with him, Kathryn. I had to do things to him, with him, that I'd never… There couldn't be anything clinical about it and you know it. That's why I wanted another way."
Kathryn took on a defensive tone. "I didn't expect you not to feel anything, I just hope that it won't be too hard on B'Elanna and Tom."
Chuckling, he looked at the chronometer on his wrist. "Trust me. B'Elanna and Tom are fine with the whole thing. As a matter of fact, I'd say they're about fifteen minutes into B'Elanna proving to him that he still needs a woman. Not a bad deal, if you ask me." He looked back up at the ceiling, willing the room to stop spinning.
He sensed her leaning toward him and when he focused his eyes back on hers, he saw a frown as she reached her hand to his chin. Her thumb rubbed across the stubble, concentration on her face. Chakotay winced and pulled away from the pain.
She regarded him wide-eyed. "I thought you were smudged."
"It's a bruise. I'm sure I have few others, too. But Paris looks worse." Chuckling at his own bravado, he scrubbed his face with his hands.
"Did you fight? Did he hit you?"
"Let's just call it an unusual type of foreplay. Nothing like a good fight to get your blood pumping." The alcohol talked for him, rubbing it in. He justified that he'd had to live through it. The least she could do is hear a few details.
She shook her head. "I just can't imagine…"
Still leaning back on the sofa, he reached for her hand, tightly gripping her wrist. "But you're trying to, aren't you? You're trying to imagine how it was. Let me help you along a little. After all, we both know that's why I'm here." An edge crept into Chakotay's tone.
"I used my boxing program. We fought a little, drank a little, fought some more. And then we spent the better part of an hour exchanging fluids. Quite a few times. I even surprised myself. I guess it's been too long. I don't get into holosex, and masturbation isn't quite the same thing as a warm and willing body."
She tried to pull away from him, both her hand and her eyes, but failed to disconnect in any way.
"But you wouldn't understand any of that, would you Kathryn? How long has it been since you felt a warm, hard body over you? Or under you." He knew he had crossed the line a few moments back. Talking this freely with her left him lightheaded, and having nothing left to lose, he plowed ahead.
"I don't know how you do it, but I'm not made to live like this. Maybe this is why this whole thing happened. It showed me what's missing in my life. I need something real, Kathryn." He searched her face for a glimmer of understanding and failed to see it. Dropping her hand, his head rolled back, once again studying the ceiling.
"I'm sorry. It's just been a hell of a night. I'm worn to a nub." Realizing how that sounded, he cut his eyes to hers and then back overhead. What the hell am I carrying on about anyway? He recalled that this is why he shouldn't drink…
Kathryn sat back on the sofa next to him, joining his inspection of the acoustic tiles above them. Her leg brushed against his and she gently placed her hand on his thigh as she spoke.
"I wanted to tell you something. I didn't get to finish what I started to say before you left earlier. No," she corrected herself. "I lost my nerve to say what I wanted to say." She nibbled on her lower lip and closed her eyes, as if in prayer for courage.
"What's that?" I wish…
"I wish it could have been different. It might have been me. I wish I could have helped you like Tom did." He turned his neck, facing her, until her eyes finally met his.
"I don't. I'm glad you weren't there this morning, Kathryn."
She recoiled as if she'd been slapped. Chakotay placed his hand over hers as it rested on his trouser leg. He rubbed the back of her fingers with his thumb.
"I don't want you to have to be with me. If we come together, I want it to be because you choose to. I need to know that you want me as much as I want you. Anything less than that… And if that's the only way you ever see us together, forced by circumstance, then I'd rather have you only in my dreams. It means too much."
The speech drained the last of his reserves and he released her hand, closing his eyes to her.
They sat together for a good time, hearing each other breathe and soaking in the declaration. He faintly heard her ask him if he'd like tea, and the next thing he knew, he was being eased onto his side. In his exhausted stupor, he could swear he heard her…sniffing him…
Jolting awake, the scent of Kathryn surrounded him. He lay on her sofa, a bed pillow at his head. Breathing deeply, he realized she'd given him her own pillow. And by the clock on the wall, he'd slept nearly three hours.
Light spilled from the doorway to her bedroom. As he approached, carrying the pillow, he saw her sitting up in bed, several PADDS strewn around her. She'd changed into a blue satin robe, which was cinched at her waist, and her bare legs, crossed at the ankles, stretched in front of her.
He stood at the entrance and made a small noise with his throat and she looked up, surprised to see him. "I thought you'd sleep all night there…I just couldn't bear to wake you. I'm sure you were tired."
"Thank you for lending me this." He tossed the pillow across the room, landing it softly in her lap. "I'd have a neck ache if you hadn't saved me from myself."
She smiled and held the pillow up to her face, breathing in deeply. She'll smell it on you…
"I need a shower. Real water. I never feel clean after a holographic one…"
Still clutching the pillow, she watched as he turned to leave.
"Goodnight. Thanks for…letting me decompress."
~ ^ ~
The steam and heat soothed the sore muscles in his back. He would feel the effects of this for days. And the ugly bruise on his shoulder from Tom's sucker kick stung from the pounding of the water. As he spread soap over his chest, he felt the bite mark and wished he had a dermal regenerator of his own. There was no way he'd take this to the doctor. At least it didn't show.
Scrubbing at himself with a sponge, Chakotay tried to erase the feel and memory of Tom. That would take some work, but at least he could put it in the proper perspective. What he'd told Kathryn was true. He was glad it had been Tom and not her. Sorting out his feelings after that would have been impossible. If she ever came to him, he wanted it to be because she needed him. Loved him. Wanted to make love to him.
As if in a dream, Kathryn appeared in front of him, shrouded by steam. Wearing the same blue robe he'd just left her in, he thought her a vision. Untying the belt, she let the robe fall open, the inside curves of her breasts barely visible under the satin. The tiny pillow of flesh below her navel drew his eyes to the brown curls between white thighs. Utterly feminine, she sighed, breaking the spell.
"I do want you. I wanted it to be me… I need something real, too, and I'm sick of trying to pretend that I don't love you. It's too much work…"
She's real.
Slipping the robe off of her shoulders and to the floor, she moved toward him, stopping just in front of him. A delicate hand reached into the stream of water and traced the purplish bruise and the marks on his chest. Kissing her fingertips, she swirled them over the wet wounds. Water poured down over them both as they met, touching gently, the hesitation of new lovers.
He needed this. He needed her to be female to his male. Falling into her softness, he pulled her body to his, pressed naked to her before they'd as much as kissed. And then her lips found his and he once again dove into the abyss of softness. Spreading gentle kisses on his face, she touched her tongue to the bruise on his chin.
A sob wracked Chakotay and he wrapped his arms tightly around her waist and shoulders, blending her skin with his. Her mouth yielded to his tongue and his lips as they crushed against and into hers. Pulling her deeper into the water spray, he fit his hands over her ass and felt her body mold to his.
He couldn't get enough of her kisses. Water dripped from her hair onto their mouths as he nibbled along her bottom lip, lapping up her taste and feeding it back to her. Tongue plunging deep, he moved a hand to the back of her head to hold her while he sucked at her.
Groaning, Kathryn twisted against his with her lips. Small hands held his face still as she pushed her tongue into his mouth.
The coffee taste of her overpowered the stale alcohol of his own mouth and he needed to taste all of her. But he couldn't seem to pull his lips from hers.
Hot water chasing it, his hand slid over her hip, snaking its way between them, where he touched and cupped her sex. The hair, softer than it should be, dripped with the shower water and her own wetness. Two fingers curved and slid into her, her body giving under the pressure, hot and slippery. Deep into her they probed, rubbing and feeling, reveling in the softness and honey texture of her.
Withdrawing from the heat, he pulled his fingers from her and brought his hand to their mouths, where he tasted the buttered, yeast roll flavor of her. His lips never left hers, and she welcomed the dripping fingers between them, tasting her essence along with him.
Tilting her head back to expose her neck, Kathryn hummed as he nuzzled his mouth across her throat and collarbone. Her hands left his face and moved along his arms, squeezing the hard muscles as she went. One hand returned to his shoulder, to steady herself, and the other skated with the water to his rigid length, squashed against her belly. Tickling and teasing, Kathryn moved over him with the tips of her fingers and the delicate scraping of her nails.
Leaning back further, she offered him soft breasts with tiny, pink nipples. He held her up with a hand at her back, arching her until the tips pointed overhead, begging him to taste and suck, lap and nibble.
Feasting from her, he imagined a tiny dark head at her breast, swollen with milk, cooing and gazing up at her in satisfaction and pleasure. Suddenly, he wanted her full with his child, thick of hips, round of breast, skin--taut and stretched across her navel. He felt a drive to bury himself in her, crawl into her body, up her canal and into her womb.
For the third time that day, he felt tile at his back, and eased himself onto his knees, Kathryn straddling him. He knew how he wanted her. And the unspoken gift of the moment belonged to him. Her turn, her desires would come later. But this time belonged to him.
He kissed her tenderly, holding the stiff flesh out for her. Chakotay sat on his feet and willed himself still as she rose slightly, squatting above him. Taking the tip to her entrance, she sank onto him-- wet, fluid, heat-- the texture of her walls caressing, squeezing, rubbing against him. The flower of her sex opened its petals, inviting him to taste the nectar that was Kathryn.
They made love in the shower and again in his bed, whispered and shouted declarations of their love the only words necessary between them.
~ ^ ~
The chime sounded at his door. Who the hell could it be this late? "Computer, who's at the door?"
"Lieutenant Torres is at the door."
"I'll go see what she wants." He left Kathryn in his bed, warm and wet from their passion.
Donning his bathrobe, Chakotay stepped out in the living room to greet his old friend. "Enter." He wondered how much information Paris had shared with her about their afternoon. Was she here to smack him around a little or pat him on the back? With B'Elanna, you never knew.
She entered carrying a small black case and stopped just inside the door. "I hear you have a bite wound that needs a dermal regenerator. Tom said it looked like it could get infected if you didn't take care of it. And both us knew you'd never go to the doctor, so…" She held up Tom's med kit.
He didn't make a move to acknowledge what she said.
"Chakotay. It's a bite. You know they're the worst for spreading infection. Just let me run the dermal over it a few times, okay?"
It still hurt like hell, he had to admit. He moved over to the sofa and sat down, pulling open the top part of his robe to expose the bite.
"Mmm. I've seen 'em like this in the mirror a few times." B'Elanna unzipped the medkit and pulled out the instrument. "He really gets into all that Klingon biting shit."
The sensitive skin glowed purple and the red marks began to disappear. Keeping her eyes on the work, she told him, "Tom's been asleep forever. You?"
"Oh, I'm fine. I napped a few hours."
"You guys really wore yourselves out…"
"B'Elanna…"
She moved the regenerator to his shoulder and worked at the bruise from Tom's kick. "Tom said you'd never been with a man before."
"I'm glad he felt comfortable enough with my history to share it with you."
She glanced up at him, noting the sarcasm. "He said you were good, too."
"What is this B'E? Did he send you up here to piss me off, too?"
"No. I just thought you might want to hear that-"
"Well, I really don't want to hear anything about it, if you don't mind."
Snapping the instrument closed, she placed it back in the kit and zipped it.
"Oh, yeah. After Tom went to sleep, I hacked into the holodeck logs and encrypted the playback of the session. I'm sure neither of you would want anyone to do a little snooping and uncover it."
Chakotay glared at her. "B'Elanna… Did you…? You watched it, didn't you?!" He scrubbed at his face with his palms. "How could you…?" He stood up, pacing in front of her a moment and then walked to the door.
She looked at her lap and then back at him with pleading eyes. "He's my husband, Chakotay… I mean, I had to see if there was anything, you know, I had to know."
"And?! Was everything to your satisfaction, Mrs. Paris? Did you enjoy yourself at my expense? I can't believe you'd show such a lack of trust in me. Or in Tom for that matter… Did you think you'd see us declaring our undying love for one another?! Plotting to run off together the first time we had a chance? Or did you just want to satisfy your own little fantasies?!"
B'Elanna picked up the kit and followed him to the door in a huff. "You just don't understand! You've never pledged yourself 'til death do us part' and then had to send him off to spend the afternoon screwing someone! You just give that a try and then tell me what you'd do!"
"I think you owe Chakotay an apology." Kathryn stood at the doorway to Chakotay's bedroom in her blue robe.
"Ca…Captain?!" B'Elanna's jaw dropped as she looked from one to the other, incredulous. "How long? I mean, Tom didn't even know!"
"Oh, you can assure Mr. Paris that before this evening, there wasn't much to know, but I insist that you apologize to Chakotay. What you did was an incredible breach of trust, not to mention in violation of dozens of regulations regarding the use and privacy of holodeck privileges."
B'Elanna stammered. "I, uh, I…I'm sorry, Chakotay. It was wrong. And I hope you'll forgive me."
He saw the tears pooling in her lower lids and pulled her into a bear hug, kissing the top of head. "I know this was hard on you, B'E. And I'm sorry that I pulled Tom into this, too."
Hugging him back, she buried her face in his chest and spoke softly. "I'm happy for you, big brother. I'm glad you finally found a way to be together."
Chuckling, Chakotay released her and mussed her hair. "I guess I have no more secrets from you now, huh?"
"Oh, I'm sure you and the captain can create a few of your own!" She winked at Kathryn. "And Captain? I'll give you the codes to the encrypted files just in case you need them in the future. You know, for medical purposes?"
Kathryn laughed out loud. "I'd only review them with Chakotay's permission, but yes, send them on to me."
Chakotay put his hand around Kathryn's waist and pulled her close to his side.
Allowing the door to close, Chakotay then pulled Kathryn into a deeper embrace, kissing her softly, but with growing passion. He wrenched away from her and held her gaze steady. "Now what makes you think I'd ever give you permission to view that file, Kathryn?"
"Oh, I might ask you sweetly enough…" She batted her eyelashes at him, "or you might realize that it'd make Tom just as uncomfortable as it made you…"
An evil laugh escaped him. "Oh, and an uncomfortable Tom is just what the doctor ordered!" Swinging her up into his arms, Chakotay strode into the bedroom…
~ ^ ~
"Chakotay! You sent me flowers?" Kathryn picked up the bouquet of white blossoms sitting on the table in his quarters and smelled them. "They look familiar. Do you suppose…?"
Toweling his hair, and another wrapped around his waist, Chakotay joined her in the living room. Eager to face the new day as her lover, he stopped suddenly at the sight of Kathryn's face buried in the huge flower. "NO! Where'd you get that?!"
"You mean this is one of those endola blooms? Who would do this?! I can't-"
"Wait, there's a note attached. And it's for me." He snatched the envelope from the blossoms and broke the seal. He read the handwritten note on the pink, heart-shaped card aloud.
Roses are red;
Endolas are white.
The captain smelled something
On Chakotay last night!
--Tom
End.
© Char, February 2006 Please email me to post/distribute elsewhere.